Johannesburg - Divorce should not be the first thing people think of when they face marital challenges – those very challenges are what will make couples appreciate each other more, once they work through them and make relationships stronger.
These are the words of popular actress, singer, model and television personality Phumeza Mdabe, who offers the advice in relation to her being named as the new presenter of Our Perfect Wedding, starting at 7pm on April 9 on DStv’s Mzansi Magic channel.
Mdabe, who is married to musician and producer Mnqobi Mdabe, better known as Shota, is excited about being at the helm of the third season of the hit show after having co-hosted, with Bujy Bikwa, the popular Mzansi Magic game show Cula Sibone, since last May.
“I am excited to present Our Perfect Wedding. I have been a huge fan of the series. I will be working in a different environment, which will allow for growth,” she says.
“I am looking forward to being with couples on their special day. I am unique and believe I will bring a new feel to the show.”
The drama that comes with weddings is what Mdabe is most looking forward to in Our Perfect Wedding: “Things like meeting ‘bridezillas’ and perhaps watching cakes fall to pieces… All that makes me laugh.
“Just being there when it all happens and being able to capture it all is such a rush. It’s real life – nothing acted. I love that.”
Her role on the show, she adds, is to interact with couples on their big day and be a part of their special occasion.
“I’m not there just to document everything. I’m there to help the bride if she needs anything – like picking up her dress, or taking her to get a massage, if that’s part of her plans.
“I am there to try to keep the bride calm, support her if need be and share the excitement.”
So far, only two of the 13 episodes have been recorded – one in Gauteng and one in the North West. Mdabe says a couple from Port Shepstone in KwaZulu-Natal will also be featured on the show.
Married a year ago to Shota, Mdabe is the mother of four, but gets a little uncomfortable when asked to discuss her marriage.
“I don’t like to discuss my relationship, as it is private, but… yes, I am married and a mother. My husband has two kids from a previous relationship. I have one and we have a boy together.
“Marriage has been awesome. We built a strong foundation in the six years we were together before tying the knot.”
Does she believe there remains a place for marriage in the world of today?
“Yes, definitely,” she replies.
“Although marriage for some people is about all the wrong things – status, money and the like – I believe that if people could go back to what marriage was actually intended for, and understand that it’s for life, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, understanding what those words actually mean, then a lot would change.”
True love exists, she believes.
“It’s not easy to find, as some people mistakenly think they are falling out of love when they are over that ‘honeymoon’ phase while starting out in their relationship. I believe that being in love doesn’t mean you have to feel mushy all the time.
“When you first meet someone you love, you don’t mind habits that would normally irritate you because you are smitten with the person. But there comes a time when you calm down and reality sets in.
“If you can still stand those habits, or try to meet each other halfway in solving issues, that’s when you really enjoy being with the person, face challenges and get to experience true love at its best,” says Mdabe.
Born and raised in Joburg, Mdabe knew as a girl in high school that she wanted a career in entertainment.
“My parents didn’t know that one could study music or acting. I wanted these things and I was going to achieve them. Period. In my head, nothing and no one could stop me.”
Mdabe, whose maiden name was Dlwati, was in Grade 7 when she won a TV presenting course for 12 weeks at Jay Bee Casting.
“I excelled in my class, and it just felt so natural to be in front of the camera. I knew, then, that this was it.”
She joined a youth development group called Amajika in Jeppestown, founded by Tu Nokwe, and got a lot of experience in dance, singing and acting. “From there, things started happening. I travelled overseas and even ended up being Ma Tu’s backing vocalist.”
The year 2003 saw Mdabe enter M-Net’s second season of Idols, finishing in the top 32. “There was a lot of pressure. I was excited to make it that far, but somehow relieved when I was let go. At the end of the day it’s a competition and doesn’t define who you are or where you go.”
Mdabe went on to do studio sessions for movies, including the Leon Schuster hit Mr Bones, and landed a recording deal with Universal Music.
Her recording career started in 2007 with her first album, Feeling Brand New. Then came Breathing Out and Just Listen.
“At the moment I’m not working on anything musical. I need to be in a certain space to get inspired to write, for melodies to come. I’m now giving TV presenting a chance. I am giving it my all, taking it all in.”
Having started modelling at the age of 4, Mdabe is no stranger to the camera. She has long done advertising campaigns for stores and featured in many magazine editorials.
She singles out a modelling highlight as one in Cape Town in 2009.
“It was a TV ad shot over a week, with my call time being 6am and finishing at midnight at times. I played Cruella de Vil, if you will.
“I loved dressing up like a conniving person with the short black wig, the short skirts and dresses and extremely high shoes. It was incorporated with acting, so I could do two things at one time. I loved that.
“Modelling has given me a work ethic that nothing else could have taught me. It has definitely expanded my brand, showing people that I can handle anything that is thrown at me.”
She recalls that her first time on television was as a 6-year-old.
“I appeared as an extra, playing with other kids on a lawn, in a drama that was very popular on SABC1, but I can’t remember what it was called.
“It was very exciting for me at the time, but I was a lot more excited later when I landed a role on the second season of Sokhulu & Partners, playing a receptionist.”
She also appeared as Sandra Jacobs on the hit soapie Generations.
It is at this point that Mdabe adds that she has had to turn down a couple of acting jobs as she is not in favour of kissing or featuring in intimate scenes on screen. - The Star