DURBAN - THE violence in Phoenix, which led to the deaths of 36 people, amid the unrest and looting in KwaZulu-Natal last month, reminded South Africans of its ugly past of race-based discrimination and races being pitted against each other.
It is alleged that black people were racially profiled in Phoenix by Indians and were assaulted, and some were killed. Vehicles were also torched.
KZN residents, who are or were in inter-racial relationships, in interviews with The Mercury, said they believed openly discussing issues around race with their children was important.
Sheldon Els, who was in an inter-racial relationship and is raising a 3-year old daughter with her former partner, said she was going to openly talk to her daughter about issues surrounding race that are prevalent in the country.
“We live in a multiracial community, but people are not as understanding or as aware as they claim to be. I remember going to a bar in a predominantly white area with my then-boyfriend, and the bar owner said he is not having ‘this interracial rubbish’ in his bar.”
Els said hearing about racial incidents in the news had made her more aware of how important it was to have honest conversations with her daughter about race.
“We tend to sugar coat things and sweep them under the carpet, and that is not how I will go on about it with my daughter. I want to make her realise what the real issues are, even if it is hard. I would have prepared her for the real world,” she said.
Former Phoenix resident and ex-Idols finalist and musician Lloyd Cele with his wife Janice said having a culture of openly discussing race made the discussions around the recent violence easier. “We have children aged 12, 10, and 4. From the beginning, we agreed we would be open with them and discuss any questions they had.
“We realised that if we didn’t discuss issues such as race, religion, or sexuality, they would go to social media, and we wanted to be their source of information. This has helped us with addressing the current issue because they are able to come to us.”
Cele said with their extended family and friends, as a couple, they had chosen to advocate for people to think about their perceptions about races.
“We have to think bigger. This whole issue has taken us 20 years behind. We have to be more optimistic and patriotic and uplift each other across colour lines, whether you are in the entertainment or any other industry. Race shouldn’t be the defining factor of whether or not you support someone.”
Mervyn Abrahams said the racial differences had not been a major issue for him and his wife to address and have a conversation about with their children.
“Our kids go to a multicultural school, and they are used to the environment and do not even recognise the differences. It might be a discussion point but it has not been in our household up until now,” he said.
Abrahams said though in their environment they do not recognise the differences, he acknowledged that in society it will come up.
“The fact of the matter is that we are an interracial society, and so it will come up ,and it will be difficult. I am not afraid of them talking about it, and I think it is good for them to talk about it, but from a cultural point of view. The cultural practices and languages that are different and learn to respect the differences around that.
“I don't think the issues of race should be that big, but it should be more about understanding the cultural differences.”
THE MERCURY